fioricet

exactly 11 days ago. but who's counting? oh, and he's two years, one month old today. it's been a long road. but just know that however long it takes, it will pass. it is temporary. try your darndest to dissolve into it. it's a lot easier that way. my dear friend passed on two mantra from her early years with her sons: i am doing the best that i can, and tomorrow is a new day. i still say them at least once a day. hang in there! love,

Ooh, I like your fantasy, though. And who couldn't like Car Talk? Love it. :)

I co-slept with my first 2 kids, and they didn't sleep through the night until they were completely weaned (and in their own beds -- they never used a crib) at 2 years. Fortunately, I was younger and could handle the lack of sleep. I ended up putting my third child (11 months old) in the crib when he was 8 months old because when we co-slept, he would wake up every two hours to eat. I was a complete wreck because of the lack of sleep. He still wakes up once a night, but he's easily soothed (not nursed) and we're all sleeping much better. That said, you need to do what's right for you, Matt & Ben -- it needs to work for everyone. Good luck!

The magic number is 12, as in 12 lbs, according to my co-worker re: sleeping through the night. He has 2 kids who are pre-schoolers & are completely different from each other. I don't have kids but am a fabulous aunty who can confirm that all kids are different (as are their parents).

Thanks for acknowledging "night owls!" I have been one since I can remember despite trying to grow out of it. After 40+ years, I don't think so! Embrace the different "time zones" as you have done!

He he: "Oh, and our kitchen is too small to actually sit in" I feel you :)

You NEED to get the book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. After 4 months of not sleeping (for me) I can say that this book saved my life and that of my son. Both my doctor, who I had to go see after losing all sense of control in my life, and my son's doctor told me he shoudl be sleeping more through the night. He was waking up every two hours and needed to be fed and then rocked back to sleep. His doctor said he was big enough to not need that much food and my doctor said I needed to sleep. After reading the book it took us three days to teach our son to sleep through the night, with one feeding at 4am. Now he's over two and is a wonderful sleeper. Goes to bed at 7, sleeps 'til 6:30/7 and never tries to fight bedtime or naps. I owe it all to this book - and his attitude is so much different then other toddlers I see who do not get enough sleep. I honestly cannot say enough about this book - it talks about the importance of sleep and the crutches that most parents give their children to sleep that actually harms the process.
Oh - and I nursed him until he was 10 months old (at which point he decided that my milk was the worst thing in the world and would scream and scream when I tried to nurse him) Nursing has nothing to do with how well they sleep.

I highly recommend co-sleeping. I always swore I wouldn't do this, but ended up w/ baby #1 in our bed because one night we both fell asleep in the bed while I was nursing him and we both got sleep. It was self preservation. Now baby #2 sleeps with us. She eats a couple of times per night (age 5 months) but niether of us really has to wake up. We get far more rest - and it turns out sleeping with a baby is a warm little delight. It did take us about 3 years to get #1 in his own bed, although it wasn't any sort of terrible struggle, just an evolution.

I can't remember when they first started sleeping through the night, but it was fairly early (first three months or so). I remember the first morning after an all-night sleep, waking up to the sunshine, realizing I had not heard the baby all night. I went tearing into the baby's room, put my hand on his back just to be sure he was breathing. It seems so ridiculous now, but also so very funny. I had prayed for a complete night of sleep -- I had rocked colicky babies and I cried while they cried (please, baby, go to sleep); here I finally got my 8 hours of BLISS and was terrified! Remember the wonderful sleep you had while being pregnant, how great naps felt?? My best friend told me at the time, "Enjoy it because it's the not only the best sleep, but it's also the last good sleep you will ever get." Now, the mother of teenagers, they wonder why their curfews are so early --- because I cannot go to sleep until I hear that key turn in the lock and I know they are safe. My question is this: When do WE get to sleep through the night??

Well, I've only been a mommy for a little over three months, but in my short experience, I'm a huge fan of the books Happiest Baby on the Block and Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. And I'd pay a hundred dollars for the Miracle Blanket (although fortunately, it doesn't cost that much). It's a blessing that you can pump enough to have bottles for Matt to give to him--I'm having terrible luck, so no relief pitching from hubby, I'm on my own in the middle of the night. Good luck, I love reading your posts!

I hate to say this, but our boys did not start sleeping through the night until I weened them. I weened Joshua at about 14 months and Zachary at 12 months. (This was when they were ready.) I certainly understand and feel for the both of you. You are a lucky woman to have Matt helping with the shifts. He is lucky too, but for different reasons :) Walter never even rolled over all those hours I spent up with them. Good luck and know that in the end, it is all worth it. I feel you will both be closer to Ben because of it.

Andrea: every baby is different. My boy is a night owl (like me) and my husband is an early bird.

Our son is a little over two and sleeps in 5 hour spurts.

Whatever you do, don't wean early just because people say he will sleep better. This may be true, but I have found more value in nursing my child and holding him close. And I think the result has been very positive: he's very secure/confident and he can play well by himself. Don't get me wrong, it's been tiring, but great.

Different things work for different people/babies, but this has worked great for us.

My hubbie and I are the exact same way. He stays up half the night with our daughter and I get up early to take care of her. By the way, she is 9 months old and will only sleep through the night if she is in our bed. Sorry.

By the number of different comments you can see every baby is different! My son is 10months old and still isn't sleeping through - on a good night he goes to sleep at 7pm, wakes at 3am for a quick feed and then gets up around 6.30am (pure luxury!). On a bad night it takes an hour to convince him he is actually tired and should sleep, then he'll wake every 2 hours and refuse to go back to sleep until he has a feed, then he'll insist on getting up at 5.30am! Most days are somewhere in the middle.

DO NOT be talked into letting Ben cry it out if you don't feel comfortable with it. There ARE other options - I have done some research and am pleasantly surprised by the more gentle approaches available. They may take longer, but I personally feel better about it. I had started using some of the techniques with very good results, then last week his next lot of teeth started coming through, and he has been so miserable with it that I just do whatever it takes to make him happy.

My son started getting into a regular sleep pattern at around 3 months. So hang in there, it does get better!!

Hugs, Michelle xxx

Like Julia, you may hate me too. Both my kids were through the night at two weeks. I fed every 2 hours on schedule thru the day stretching each feeding to 3 and 4 hours. I put them to bed at night and let them cry to sleep. And yes it was hard. I never regretted having to be the tough Mom. But each of us will do as we feel is best. I am just grateful mine were wonderful years with my newborns because I was rested,recovered and relaxed. I nursed them until they were 1 year old and biting! :{
Enjoy and try not to blink too much.

Ahhh... Welcome to the land of motherhood. It can sometimes feel like such a shoddy deal, but now that my 2 are behond the super-high maintenance stage, I look back and am SO glad I learned to stay in the moment (a challenge at times) and enjoy the gifts of each moment, even in all those sleepless nights. It's a true test of living presently, that's for sure.
WEIRD! I think the almost burning down the house thing must be a symptom of Post Partum. I did that several times after I had my first baby!

I know everyone here will either hate me or think I'm lying...But my daughter began sleeping through the night by 3 or 4 weeks of age. At the time, I thought something must be wrong with her, and when I asked the pediatrician, he thought I was nuts!! I realize now that I was so blessed, and I still am. She's 9 now and likes to go to bed at 8:00pm. How awesome is that?!! But her getting up at 5:30am or so on the weekends, & being noisy is my biggest sleep concern as a parent these days.
My wish for you is that you all find many restful nights ahead. Blessings...xoxo Julia

3 1/2 to 4 months

Hey, I love the Car Talk guys! They are hilarious, and I don't care a bit about cars. I loved their funny cameo in Cars - I would know their voices anywhere!

It's good to hear that the early bird/night owl thing works out. Unfortunately, my husband works a night shift - so I think I'm pretty screwed on this one! (My mom is already planning to spend a couple of nights a week when the baby comes, thank God!)

Hate to tell you this, but my little one will be 9 months old next week and I'm still waiting for that day.

Let's hope Ben is more cooperative then my guy is!

They sleep through the night? Shut UP!!!

There is no specific time when they sleep through. At least that is my experience. First child, 8 weeks. Second child, 4 months. Third child is 4 and is a regular bedmate.

But I'm in the same boat with my husband. We are on separate sleeping schedules and it works for all the same reasons you mentioned.

I'm prone to think night owls and early birds often marry. I've yet to meet a double night owl or early bird pair. Now that I've said that they'll be popping up everywhere.

when my daughter was about 3 years old she finally started sleeping more than 2-3 hours without waking up. Now that she's 12 I struggle to get her up even after 9 hours of sleep:)

My son Miller is 9 months old and still wakes a few times a night to nurse (many more when teething). We did have a brief and lovely period around 4-5 month where he started sleeping 8 hours a night alon ein his crib...oh yeah did I mention we are co-sleepers and now he won't even go into the crib at all? I put him to sleep around 7-730, husband takes him into bed from 8-10, then I go to bed at 10 and sleep with him until morning...I hear there are babies who sleep through the night, but most of them are ferberized. Remeber sleeping through the night also means only 4-5 hours for the little ones. good luck and as I always tell myself...this to shall pass.

Well, from what I have seen as a postpartum doula, babies tend to start sleeping longer when they reach 10lb or 3 months. As other people mentioned, swaddling helps some babies, as does the white noise machine I recall you are trying to track down. Not all babies follow this rule though, and I find babies stick in the zone of sleeping 3-5 hours for a while and then take the leap (along with lots of cluster feeding) to the 7 or 8 hour mark! All the best in your quest for a future with plenty of sleep!

I've been meaning to e-mail you to say Thank You for posting so honestly and beautifully about your birth experience and the early days of motherhood. Those days are quite a ways behind me now, but your words still really touched me.

For what it's worth, we got our first 6-hour (and our first 7-hour) straight stretch of sleep when the Beaner was 2 months old, and it was a revelation. We got up to 8-10 hours a night at about 9.5-10 months.

Here's hoping Ben gets the hang of sleeping for long stretches sooner rather than later!

he is beautiful!

um...sleep is something that you need to say good-bye to for a while. my 3 year old is starting to get the hang of it but still ends up in our bed 70% of the time.

tho, i do hear of "those" babies that do sleep through the night, but i haven't any friends who have them or nor do they.

you will get used to it, i promise!
and some days are much better than other...

welcome to the crazy clan of motherhood.

When they get married.

(okay, really? my kids? when they walked - I know, not much better!)

Okay, you know how I'm always full of comforting words, and it's-all-going-to-be-so-easy talk?

Alex, my perfect little cherub of a daughter, is going to be three in a month, and she STILL doesn't sleep through the night.

Sorry... ;o)

K.

My daughter started sleeping through the night at about 4 months. Swaddling helped a ton. We started swaddling her early on and it really helped her sleep for longer stretches. Once she started sleeping through the night we stopped swaddling. She's almost 3 and I can count on one hand (well maybe two hands) the number of times she's not slept through the night. Good luck. He sure is sweet.

same here honey...tim is such a night owl and i'd gladly go to bed early :) now...i just need to figure out a job where i can work from home and get going on that second child :)

xoxo

Among my friends I have one of the worst sleepers.
Our daughter never slept in her crib until we let her cry it out at 9 1/2 months. She didn't sleep more than 45 min while being held for the first three months, but on the other hand she would sleep for 5 straight hours and then do another three after her first feeding. When the teething started everything changed. She no longer slept more than two hours at a stretch until we did the unthinkable and let her cry it out. Now she sleeps through the night in her room in her crib...

My kiddo is 4 mos. and did sleep through the night, and now doesn't. Growth spurt? who knows She doesn't nap well, either, which is tough during the day b/c I pretty much hafta let my MIL clean my house if we don't want to live in filth. Luckily, she loves to clean, God bless her.

My hubbo doesn't like Car Talk b/c he says they laugh too much. But he is strangely drawn to it when I have it on in the kitchen b/c he likes figuring out the mechanical problems. The engineer in him can't resist.

I'm glad you're feeling sane. See how perfect the Universe is?!

As for the sleeping through the night...not a clue. I know I did by 4 months, but then I switched my days and nights! Gosh, my parents loved that.

Bunches of love and sleep to you, darling.

Isn't it funny how while we might have a very clear idea of what we need, the universe knows better, and gives us what we really need, not just what we think we need. Because at the time you wrote that, you could never imagine loving someone who wasn't a morning person, but look how wonderfully it worked out instead!

i'm trying to find a baby rasta hat for Ben. ; )

i so love this post.

xoxo and love you.

We are doing the same thing in my home, though Daddy works and Mommy is on maternity leave. My first slept through the night at 3 months. This one will be 8 weeks on Sunday and his longest stretch at night is 3 hours, but he'll go right back to sleep after eating. We've pretty much got him and a schedule now, and that is helping greatly.

How can Matt not love those CarTalk guys?

It sounds like it may be another 10 years before Matt can sleep through the night. Ben should be there in about 3 months and it will last until about age 17.

you lucky mama! satchel is 20 mos old and STILL doesn't sleep through the night.

Our little one didn't really sleep through the night until he was about 9-months old. Much to my chagrin, we ended up letting him cry a bit to get him comfortable with going to sleep on his own without endless rocking. Now, at 14 months, we bathe him, read him three books, put on the lullabies, rock for one song, and put him in the crib whether he's asleep or awake. He tends to sleep - on average - 11 hours a night. I don't think I would do this until my baby was at least 6-months old though. It wasn't easy AT all. But now, we are well-rested parents and our son's a very happy boy in the morning.

Wait, am I you? Are we married to the same person? This gives me hope that we will be able to raise a child too!

Hmmmmm with son #1 it was about 6 months before he slept through the night. And of course we were awake waiting for him to wake up, would check on him regularly and truly missed his first sleep-through. Silly eh? son #2 slept through the night around 5 years old! Not kidding...but we allowed him to come quietly into our bed when he was sleepless where he happily slept the rest of the night away.

My son first slept through the night when he was 6 YEARS OLD! (All it took was getting a puppy and telling him the dog was going back if he didn't stay in his room all night. If I'd only known, we'd have brought a pooch home years earlier.) Prior to that, I'd tried everything short of bed restraints.

The first six months my son wouldn't sleep unless held by me. I felt as if I were on a redeye for six months, never having the luxury of sleeping lying down. I listened to anyone who wanted to offer advice and did everything to the letter of what they said. Nothing got my youngun' to sleep on his own, hence his status as an only child! ;)

The good news: he's grown into an awesome teen.

Oh I remember those days. I was so sleep deprived it was crazy. Fortunately, my son started sleeping through the night (6 hrs) around 2 months. Putting him on a schedule really helped and till this day he's still a great sleeper.

It was almost a year to the day when my daughter started sleeping through the night. Although I think every parent will tell you its different from one baby to another. My middle younger sister and I were good sleepers according to my parents, and then came my youngest sister. She's still a night owl. And I have to second that Ben is such a beautiful boy!

i don't know when they start to sleep through because i don't have mine yet. it sounds like that may be an individual decision made by the baby and the grace of god. when you find out can you let me know as we are in for double the trouble. i was hoping for some more shots of ben...i think i am in love with your little boy.