Feeling held*

serendipitous fortune, Canon Digital Rebel XSi

For all the ways I am excited about this new baby arriving, I am terrified in a myriad of other ways. Will he be healthy? How will the birth go? What will this do to my nearly 40 year old body? Do I have it in me to not sleep through the night for another three years? Will we be able to pull this off financially? Will I have the time and resources to run my business? These are only some of the things that keep me up at night.

In the midst of a particularly low day yesterday (this pregnancy has been super emotional, with very tender lows and lots of tears) I prayed and prayed for angels to come in and help me out, give me clarity, help me think the right thoughts, assure me that I am loved.

And nothing happened.
Until today.

While on errands this morning, as I scrounged around for spare change in my purse to feed a parking meter, I found this fortune (pictured above) instead. "Remember three months from this date. Good things are in store for you."

I pulled out my phone at looked at today's date: July 29th.
My due date is October 29th, exactly three months from today.
(I have no idea how this fortune landed in my purse.)

Tears sprang to my eyes. Okay, universe, angels, god, whoever you are. I understand. You've got me. And that's all I need to know...